Should My Teen Take Time Off After Graduation?
Gap year programs can help ADHD students gain independence, develop skills, and explore their interests.
Q: I’d like to introduce my teen to the idea of taking a gap year after high school, but I don’t want it to come off as criticism or a lack of faith in their ability. Do you have recommendations for how I can broach this topic in a way that is positive and supportive?
A: Young people, and particularly neurodivergent students, should absolutely explore and question whether they’re truly ready for college. During the COVID-19 pandemic, we saw a dramatic rise in the number of students who deferred their college admissions and took a gap year. It was a good option then, and it remains a good option now for many.
A gap year refers to a period of time, typically after graduating from high school and before starting college, when a student takes a break from formal education to pursue activities like volunteering, working, or traveling.
[Q: How Do I Know If My Teen Is Really Ready for College?]
When we think about whether a gap year is right for a student, we look at several factors:
- Academic readiness: Is the student excited to tackle college course material or do they feel burned out?
- Motivational readiness: Is the student driven to live on their own and manage the rigors of college? Are they emotionally prepared for an environment that is less structured than high school?
- Self-regulation: Does the student have a healthy sleep routine and lifestyle? Are they taking their medication on their own? If unmonitored, will they be on their devices all the time, interfering with their ability to study?
[Q: Is My Teen Taking the Easy Way Out by Deferring College?]
I would approach the conversation with your teen from a strengths-based perspective and frame the gap year as an advantage. You might say: “You are very capable of doing well and succeeding in college. I want to make sure that you reach your full potential. Taking a gap year is not about delaying college. It is about setting you up for long-term success in your future career and life. We are not derailing your college plans; we are just finding an alternate way to get there. With this extra time, you will be in a stronger position to achieve your career goals and make the most of your education.”
If you are financially supporting their college education, you could add: “College is a significant investment, and I want to make sure it is money well spent. You have so much potential, and this extra time will help you maximize your experience.”
Invite your teen into the conversation and acknowledge their concerns, especially if they’re worried about what others might think. Reassure them that, in the long run, a gap year can position them for greater success.
Gap Year Decisions: Next Steps:
- Read: Gap Year Programs for ADHD Students
- Watch: “Gap Year Pros and Cons for Neurodivergent Students”
- Read: The 4-Year College Track is Not Right for Everyone
Carolyn Jeppsen is CEO and co-founder of BroadFutures, a nonprofit created to fund internships for neurodivergent youth.
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